What the Dupatta should really cover ….

Comments

113 responses to “What the Dupatta should really cover ….”

1. 

   James Killian Spratt

   September 8, 2009

   @Carolina: Okay, women are individuals, too, and dress to suit themselves, within the boundaries of what women in their societies collectively wear. Men do the same. But the important question is “Why?” What motives? “Women LIKE to look nice.” For whom? It seems to me that your second bird–the partner’s approval–is worth one helluva lot more than the first, which could only be narcissistic, or colored by ulterior motives.

   @Adnan: Taliban, huh? I believe that, inside every adult male anywhere, is a little bit of Taliban, regarding the way you think about women, and particularly, wives. A husband is expected to sacrifice all other women, his freedom to move around, and most of his earnings to support his wife, and has a right to see that his efforts, his youth and his life are not wasted supporting some other man’s offspring, unless HE chooses to.

   A wife should not indeed “make beauties” (what a quaint and charming term 🙂 ) in front of other men, lest the other men become interested and do something that cannot be reversed, that the husband will end up paying for. We men in the West understand that, too; we are, like you, men.

   The “freedoms” of women in the West give them many more opportunities to make mistakes, and makes it easier for Western men–smart ones, anyhow–to distinguish a “good” woman from a “bad” one, BEFORE he marries her and is stuck with her for life. This policy enables us to trust our women with their own bodies on a longer “leash” and enables them to be something more than just baby-makers and property. The same connubial values hold for us as hold for you, although they are not as apparent.

   When women are put under such strict rules as you and your fellows promulgate, they get little chance to show their true potentials. The difference between “fear” and “respect” is a massive one; a woman who respects you will stand behind you willingly, and help you, but a woman who fears you will be not much assistance.

   I believe your ideology has some very good points–the West is truly missing some pieces of the puzzle–, of which much fruitful discussion could be made, but we must find common ground by discussion and agreement, not by warfare. I think it is a shame that we are shooting at each other, don’t you? Can’t we do better than this?

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2. 

   James Killian Spratt

   September 7, 2009

   @Shakir: Oh-ho. I’d be inclined to give Mohammad a break; I remember what I was thinking about every hour when I was 23. Don’t you? I think his comments are sober, decent and to the point (except when he starts going on about black magic, at which point he gets me wondering.) His writing skills are darned good, admittedly not on a par with yours, but he probably didn’t get the same education that you got as early, either.

   @Yusha: We have a saying–“clothes make the man,” that means you define yourself with the clothes you are wearing at the time, e.g., in blue jeans and t-shirt you can be quite casual in public, but in a 3-piece suit you behave with more decorum, possibly because more people will be looking, admiring your fine looks in your fine clothes. Women do it, too, and it could be that the dressed-up woman only wants to be admired by a dressed-up man, and the slobs can go jump.

   When a woman looks at a strange man, her first thought is how much is he worth, and when a man looks at a strange woman, his first thought is what does she look like naked. I don’t think her thoughts readily go to picking his pocket, nor his to raping her. If you want to attract women, dress sharp, especially your shoes.

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3. 

   Shakir Lakhani

   September 7, 2009

   @ Yusha: I don’t think I need to work on comprehension or communication skills. I’ve been writing since I was 15, and I think I’m a better writer than you are. As far as slandering you is concerned, I don’t even have to try. The garbage you dish out proves that you’re not quite right in the head.

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4. 

   Mohammad Yusha

   September 7, 2009

   >…The thought of raping her never enters my mind.

   Your comment is that of comparision. It is as though the thought of raping her enters my mind. Please work on your comprehension skills and try not to attack other people’s character in a cleverly disguised manner.

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5. 

   Shakir Lakhani

   September 7, 2009

   Yusha: what I wrote was “you may be the type of man who wants to rape every pretty woman he sees”, not “you are the type….”. Now it’s clear that you’re the one who needs some comprehension skill development.

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6. 

   Mohammad Yusha

   September 7, 2009

   @Mr Lakhani: What did I say that may even remotely suggest that I want to rape women. Are you a vicious slanderer or do you need to work on your comprehension skills?

   @Carolina: I have seen western girls get angry when guys look at them, even though they are wearing make up and sexy clothing. On the last point, you did mention that there is nothing wrong with looking at a woman thinking, wow, I want to rape her. Now that is weird.

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7. 

   Shakir Lakhani

   September 6, 2009

   @ Yusha; you may be the type of man who wants to rape every pretty woman he sees. When I see a pretty woman, I thank God he’s made this world so beautiful. The thought of raping her never enters my mind.

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8. 

   Carolina

   September 6, 2009

   Yusha:
   1: the first comment was aimed at anyone who feels that it is wrong to look at a member of the opposite sex and appreciate their looks. It was a general usage of ‘you’, not aimed at anyone in particular but a mindset.
   2. muslim women are taught that to dress conservatively is to protect their modesty and to protect them from being harmed. I assume that’s harm from men, not animals or other women. Therefore, perhaps they become angry because they feel that a man who looks at them is looking to harm them, or they feel guilty for not being attired appropriately. You’d have to ask them. But I doubt muslim women are so much different to other women that they’d react negatively to a nice compliment. Perhaps they would…
   3. you completely missed my last point. I said it was wrong to look at a woman with a wish to harm her. Looking with appreciation should not be a problem IMO. And no, no woman wants to be raped. Don’t worry, we’re not that weird.

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9. 

   Mohammad Yusha

   September 6, 2009

   @Carolina:

   >But c’mon… you’ve got to stop thinking that looking at a woman and thinking she looks nice is awful.

   Who is the above comment aimed at?

   >It’s not. She’d really appreciate it too, if she knew

   They get angry when they see guys looking at them, so I’m not so sure if they would really appreciate it?

   >What is wrong is looking at a woman and thinking, wow, I want to rape her

   You sound like every woman wants men to want to rape them? That is really weird. I don’t think any woman in the world wants men to think that. Would you like men to think like that about you?

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10. 

    Shakir Lakhani

    September 5, 2009

    Mr. Adnan, I believe that Taliban and Al-Qaeda are the real enemies of Muslims, because every day they kill Muslims in Pakistan and Afghanistan.

    Reply