Chowrangi

TV, Furniture, Washing Machine, Fridge and a Car – All in Dowry

Dowry isn’t just cash that devils accept from the parents of the girl. Dowry includes all those things I have mentioned in the title among others. There will always be devils in the world, there have always been. However, is it necessary for fathers to marry their daughters to devils who ask for Dowry? Isn’t it obvious that they are not human beings. People who show this level of greediness before marriage will actually make life hell for the girl after. Isn’t this obvious?

One thing is that if all fathers refused to give one paisa in Dowry, let alone a Car, T.V. etc. Don’t marry your daughter to an animal who cannot see anything beyond money. If he is a human being, he will refuse to accept Dowry.

Girls should refuse to marry such freaks who’s parents ask for money or even refuse to accept it even if they haven’t asked. I am asking girls all over India, Pakistan, Bangladesh and Sri Lanka to take a step and fight against this menace. Girls are not the timid, shy people they used to be. Girls can make a difference.

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Mohammad Yusha

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24 responses to “TV, Furniture, Washing Machine, Fridge and a Car – All in Dowry”

  1. Shakir Lakhani Avatar
    Shakir Lakhani

    @ Hend: “you spend your time here bashing the west for being anti islamic and anti pakistani”? Are you sure you haven’t had too much to drink? I’ve never bashed the west for being anti-Islamic. BTW, I have a lot of relatives living in the West, something that wouldn’t have been possible if Memons hadn’t left India in 1947. As for Sana’s future in-laws, they’re a lot better than people who get their daughters married to dogs or trees, or who burn widows on the funeral pyres of their husbands.

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  2. Hend Avatar
    Hend

    shakir

    isnt it ironic that your daughter living in UK a western country…and you spend your time here bashing the west for being anti islamic and anti pakistani?

    sana

    since you have already decided i dont want to discourage you but looking at their behaviour already…they seem backward like all memons are…the question is not really what you are prepared for but rather if your husband can stand up for you against his parents when need comes and if he can take the pressure from both sides…it is good to know you dont want to burden your parents…

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  3. Shakir Lakhani Avatar
    Shakir Lakhani

    @ Sana Ahmed: you’re lucky you’ll be living outside the country during the first few years of your marriage. My youngest daughter has been living in the U.K. ever since she was married. No, you don’t have to buy furniture or anything. You can get furnished apartments in Bahrain, and you can buy whatever you want over there and bring it back with you to Karachi (even furniture, as my son did when he returned after living in Dubai). As for the little things, your parents can give your ma-in-law and her daughters some jewellery at the time of your marriage (your father-in-law shouldn’t mind if he gets a Rs. 25,000 watch and a suit, and the same goes for your future husband’s brothers). I don’t think you’ll have to spend more than Rs. 150,000 on these things, depending on how many brothers and sisters the lucky bridegroom has. But I’m sure they won’t mind even if they are given much cheaper stuff. As for their belief in black magic, don’t worry, you won’t be living with them (not for the first few years anyway), so it shouldn’t bother you.

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  4. Sana Ahmed Avatar
    Sana Ahmed

    Thanx for all ur replies! Im glad i found a forum where i can discuss this cox i cant discuss it wid anyone in person.
    I have been trying to please them as much as i can. Iv sacrificed my career 9They dont want me to work), my friends, my social life and infact have transformed into a whole new person. But sumtimes i do feel tht it doesnt even matter to em. watever i do….i cant change the fact tht m not a memon. ….n i guess thts all they care for. But still i do have hope tht after shadi i might b able to change their perspective abt me. InshAllah!

    Hend: ‘it can get worse and you might spend your life trying to win the approval of the undeserved’ I have felt tht way quite alot of times tht may b my efforts will never b fruitful…..esp wen they blamed me for doing sum kind of a magic on their son 🙁 But Allah ka shukar hai tht God gave me strength to forgive em and I didnt keep the thing inside my heart. But still deep down i do have the fear of wat u said 🙁

    Mr. Shakir: Im prepared for all sorts of future allegations and problems tht i will hav to face. Karate also seems like a gud idea 😉 Its really refreshing to see tht the memon community also includes ppl like u. So i guess we shdnt stereotype….well mayb the majority is typical but not all.

    Btw my fiancee works in Bahrain n il b moving there with him. I dont think i can burden my parents with the cost of an apt there. But shud i still buy the ghareloo saman? Like furniture n all to be kept at his place back here? My parents r thinking theyl just give cash n we can buy watever we want over there. But m scared tht this might create a new issue tht ‘Larki kuch lekar he nahe aye’. I already have so much to handle tht i dont think i have room for yet another issue 😛

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  5. Shakir Lakhani Avatar
    Shakir Lakhani

    @ Sana Ahmed: “Btw wat else do they giv their daughters apart frm a house? n wat abt the cash given to the guy? Wat is the normal tradition?” As I said earlier, it depends on the wealth of the bride’s father. If you think you can live with your in-laws, tell your father not to buy a house for you. If he insists, you can give it on rent. Cash given to the groom: anything from Rs. 10,000 to Rs. 100,000 or even more (again depending upon the status of the bride’s father). Of course, there’s no need to spend so much (except on furniture), just go on a honeymoon to Europe or Malaysia with the money your dad wants to give you. But if you are going to live separately with your husband, you’ll need the apartment, furniture, fridge, car, microwave oven, and whatever is required in the kitchen.

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  6. Hend Avatar
    Hend

    shakir

    “If India wants him back, all it has to do is to ask Interpol to arrest him”

    is this a joke? there are already number of interpol red corner alerts against him…but pakistani ncb which is the arm of interpol in pakistan cannot go against the command of your government, military, foreign office and foreign policy. next give better reply.

    you did a good job of massod azhar who was giving public speaches in pakistan after being released by india by hijack and who cut the throat of daniel pearl…you you guys run some kind of criminal protection syndicate?

    Reply
  7. Hend Avatar
    Hend

    sana…looks like bantwa or no bantva…memons are a problem…as far as dowry goes, don’t pay a dime to such people. dowry is against religion, against humanity. regarding hijab (or abaya or whetever name you use it)…you should go by your conviction and make that clear with your husband…dont let yourself in a suffocating atmosphere hoping that it is change someday…it does not…it can get worse and you might spend your life trying to win the approval of the undeserved…who regard you as a badmash…better marry a hindoo

    Reply
  8. Shakir Lakhani Avatar
    Shakir Lakhani

    @ Sana Ahmed: “Wat abt his own daughter who doesnt even take a hijab?” This is a personal matter. No civilized person can force his wife or daughter to observe purdah. My wife has never observed purdah, but owing to the current fundamentalism my daughter wears the hijab while my daughter-in-law wears the abaya (she’s lived in Dubai all her life). Re. the fact that your future in-laws are not happy with you, you can try to make them change their opinion. I foresee a lot of problems for you after your marriage, so you’d better start practising meditation. It will keep you calm whenever there’s friction in the house. Of course, you could learn judo and karate and use the skill to force your husband’s relatives to change their opinion about you, but I wouldn’t advise it. A girl who is distantly related to me did it and her in-laws always respected her after that, but it took a long time for her ma-in-law to recover from the injuries she sustained.

    Reply
  9. Sana Ahmed Avatar
    Sana Ahmed

    hmmm……well they did oppose….alot in fact….but in the end they had to give up 😛 So they r not quite happy with our marriage. One thing tht i have noticed is (No offence) that memons feel tht their daughters and sisters are the only shareef females….even if they dont cover their heads. I take a proper hijab n still my susar to be opposed with a reason tht i might take it off in the future. Wat abt his own daughter who doesnt even take a hijab? Unhain lagta hai tht they r shareef n baqi sab badmash hain. Kher my fiancee says tht they dont want anything but i still hav doubts. n btw they r Bantwa memons. M so dam confused. Btw wat else do they giv their daughters apart frm a house? n wat abt the cash given to the guy? Wat is the normal tradition?

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  10. Shakir Lakhani Avatar
    Shakir Lakhani

    Hend: you don’t have a sense of humour. Of course your questions aren’t making me uncomfortable. It’s only that sometimes you sound so opinionated (like the jihadis) that I wish I could strangle you. I often feel that way with others, particularly those who work with me.

    Reply
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