Dowry Harassment: Silence Hides Violence

Slapped on the face, punched in the stomach, burnt with cigarettes, burnt with iron, poisoned, electrocuted and burnt to death. These are just very few ways that daughters-in-law are tortured and murdered for dowry.

Many parents pray that a daughter is not born to them. If she is, the father starts saving right from the time of her birth to pay for dowry when she is of marriageable age. When she does get married, she is tortured to bring more and more dowry, until eventually, she is killed.

Most die from third degree burns after they are set on fire in the kitchen. Imagine what the mother goes through who raised her daughter with utmost love and care. Imagine what the father goes through who spent all his life earning to see her daughter get married and live a happy life. All this love and sacrifice only to see their daughter tortured to death.

When I read about a woman who was killed because she brought a Maruti in dowry while her husband thought that she should have brought a more expensive car, I thought I had read about the most pathetic dowry death ever. But then, I came across an even more bizarre case. A woman was harassed and forced to commit suicide even after her husband and in-laws had been “gifted” an 11 lac Hyundai. If a woman is going to get harassed to death for bringing an 11 lac car in dowry, then what on earth is she supposed to bring. Diamonds worth crores?

Women are partly responsible for their misery because they don’t speak up. Their silence is what encourages coward husbands and in-laws to continue torturing them. A woman’s parents continuously fulfilling dowry demands is the worst thing that they can do. They are not doing anyone a favor, least of all their daughter.


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7 responses to “Dowry Harassment: Silence Hides Violence”

  1. Eraj Danish Avatar

    all elements of terror should be exited from our soil. That is what I care about. Acts such as these are condemned by the entire nation. The extremists will not win this land at any cost.

  2. Mohammad Yusha Avatar

    @Hina: All men have to look inside their ‘girebaan’, making fun of Hindus and following their customs at the same time.

  3. Hina Safdar Avatar

    @Yusha
    What you have asked has to be answered by You (men).

  4. Mohammad Yusha Avatar

    @Hina: The parents of the bride are not responsible but they aid the misery of their daughters by continuously trying to fulfill repeated demands of dowry. Also, how many unmarried men have made their mind up to refuse dowry at the time of their marriage even if it is given willingly?

    @Skunk and Mr. Lakhani: Thanks for the comments.

  5. Shakir Lakhani Avatar

    I can tell you that this problem doesn’t exist in Pakistan. Here, among the illiterate and violent communities, there is a shortage of females, so it’s the groom (or his father) who has to provide dowry to the bride’s family. One of my workers had to go to Libya to earn money to buy gold and jewelery for his future wife before her father let him marry her. Another became rich because he was the father of six girls. But in some communities (like the Memons from Bantva-India, for instance), the number of females is very high, so the bride’s parents have to provide an apartment (and sometimes even a bungalow) before she can be married. However, even in such cases, there is no violence against the bride. Of course in such cases the bride doesn’t have to live with her in-laws. There may be taunts and jeers, but no violence, because the property is in her name and the in-laws know that if she’s tortured or harassed, she can get her husband thrown out of her house.

  6. Hina Safdar Avatar

    It is not right to say that brides parents are responsible for it. The harassment always come from grooms side usually from his parents or family. For Brides future parents feel that the dowry will give her a social status and acceptance.

    The only solution to end this misery is effectively implemented legislation and social awareness. But it seems difficult.

    Men’s role is more important. They can take stand against dowry. How many of you have not taken it?

  7. Skunk Avatar
    Skunk

    the darkest and saddest part of south Asian society which does not seem to end anytime soon.

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