Radio Gupistan (For Adults Only)

Welcome to the age of modern enlightenment. Your red cheeks, unbridled laughter, noticeable apathy, and swollen belly indicates that you are from Pakistan. That’s fine with me, because I am like you. We are going to give you a run-down on what grounds this Aziz-regime (sounds stange? ok Musharraf regime) has done in the past years, especially in the past three years.

Well don’t start clapping, first listen, and you! in last row don’t ogle at that lady, she is the anchorperson at PTV of that program in which president talks with the nation. And You! hey whats wrong with you, why push everyone, when you have such an elevated place? And You! stop picking your nose, and hey here hold this freakin’ mike of your’s, I don’t need it. Well now, when all is settled, let me present you some salient landmark short-cuts oh sorry success of Aziz regime.

1- Due to the focused attention that has been given to the prioritization of objectives, high rate of economic growth are evident everywhere. Jeepo Jeepers, You disgusting cower in the first row at my left, why are you winking at me continuously?

2- On Aziz’s special instruction, Pervez Elahi is distributing a staggering amount of Rs. 500 in the poor to wipe out the menace of poverty in a single master stroke. O No, stand up you sub-human crawler in the 3rd row at the corner, why are you leaning against that lady? Hey lady Kick him in the butt.

3- Aziz Jee has created a responsive government in alignment with best international practices. And Hey You! the sadist smiler in the 5th row, stop grinning that dreadful smile of your’s.

4- The dream that citizens have free and efficient access to pubic service oh sorry public service institutes has become a reality. Wake Up, you turd-looking creep in the second last row.

5- Freedom of media that has no parallel in Pakistani history is yet another bold step of the present regime, which has no parallel in the modern or ancient era. Oay, mucus-like-pussyfoot, what do you think, who I am? A dog barking in rain? Or your Fancy’s mother-in-law going frantic after catching you with her “Bahoo” red-handed?

I tell Ya, If those are your manners, than you don’t deserve listening what else that banker-cum-politician has done for you. And don’t you start making guesses about cum.


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